He was never going to love me the way that I needed to be loved. I hoped that he would one day come to understand how a woman of my caliber should be treated. I was looking for him to change. I wanted him to improve his quality of care for me because I loved him. I needed him to grow to be the man that I deserved. I was looking for him to do something, anything to show me that he wanted me to stay, give me a sign, a small sign that he would make progress.
While we were together, I felt as if I was under a dark cloud everywhere I went. My walk became slower, my attitude became lower, my style became drab and my tone became flat. Then one day it happened. I realized that this was not the condition that I should be. I needed a release but the startling thing was that the release that I needed wasn’t from him, it needed to come from me. I needed to release myself from under that cloud that I allowed to form above my head. I soon began to understand that it was not him who had to change, it was me.
I realized that he was incapable of loving me the way that I needed to be loved and it was at that very moment, that I began to walk away from the man I loved for so long. That day was an awesome day. Although, I must admit I turned around for a brief second, but it was only then that I saw that the clouds that were constantly lurked above my head now exclusively hovering over him. The further I moved away from him the more I began to see sunlight beaming through. That was the day that I finally realized that the sun didn’t stop shining for me, it only seemed that way because I was constantly standing in his rain.